Ode to Abalone

Andre, the Boulevardier

lifts up a stiff Negroni,

And makes this toast: “Pride of the Coast!

All hail the Abalone!”

A toothsome treat for gastronomes

and all their tony cronies,

Prepared sashimi-style its known

To banish acrimony!

Serve butter-seared and guests will cheer,

so moved they might get poemy;

Great chefs all hail the holy grail

of snails, the Abalone.

 

But not wild sourced! A law’s in force!

From aqua-farmers only,

who love the coast, to play the host,

to slow-grown Abalone.


 

As Trevor Fay in Monterey,

down by the bay has shown me,

A crowded tray’s a proud display

when crammed with Abalone.

 

And in a sort of snail resort,

the Gastropods find homey,

Tom Ebert down in Davenport

attends the Abalone.

So skip the lobster or filet

for your next ceremony,

Sustainable, (if raised this way!),

is tasty Abalone.

 

A sacred bounty of the sea,

Much prized by the Ohlone,

We pray you thrive eternally,

Oh noble Abalone!