Trump Warns The Future

 “First, I just wanna say that I’m sorry the Future couldn’t be here today to join me in making this announcement. I know that many of you in the press are making lots of excuses for the Future, saying all sorts of things like: “Oh, its the Future! How can it be here today!” and many other unfair things, but frankly, and I think everyone would agree with me on this, frankly, I think it shows a great deal of cowardice on the part of the Future not to be here and also a tremendous lack of courage, to be very honest with you.

But I will say this that, despite the fact that the Future is not here today and has been a very bad actor in the past, a very, very bad actor indeed. I will tell you this. In a very very important meeting that I just had last week with the Future it has totally assured me of the complete confidence it has in me as its President.

And the Future has also assured me that from now on it will do absolutely everything within in its power to provide very positive and beneficial outcomes to all of my future presidential decisions, including those I have made in the past, and from this point forward.

And just to be sure that there is absolutely no doubt in the Future’s regarding the very important promise it has already made to me I am going to simply advise the Future to be very, very careful from now on about the kind of things it decides to let happen. Very careful indeed. That’s all I’m gonna to say. Thank you.