Andre, the Boulevardier
lifts up a stiff Negroni,
And makes this toast: “Pride of the Coast!
All hail the Abalone!”
That toothsome treat for Gastronomes
and all their tony cronies.
Prepared sashimi-style its known
to banish acrimony!
When butter-seared, the critics cheer,
so moved they oft get poemy;
For all chefs hail this holy grail
of snails, the Abalone!
And yet perforce they must be sourced
From aqua-farmers only,
who cherish most a healthy coast
when raising Abalone.
As Trevor Fay in Monterey,
down by the bay has shown me,
Sustainable in every way
his tray of Abalone.
And in a sort of snail resort,
his Gastropods find homey,
Tom Ebert down in Davenport
farms slow-grown Abalone.
So skip the lobster or filet
for your next ceremony.
The pride of healthy kelply bays
Is tasty Abalone.
A sacred bounty of the sea,
Much prized by the Ohlone,
May they survive eternally,
The noble Abalone!